Do you often have quarrels in your family over household chores, money, or sex? Try to follow some rules to resolve family differences. Of course, you can follow the advice of a psychologist from a magazine or read a relevant book or discuss problems with your closest friends to express your outrage at your husband's behavior. But you will never be able to cope with this if you do not think about your husband, do not talk to him.
1. The distribution of homework is 50/50.
If you strive to share responsibilities 50/50, it means that you are constantly concerned about this issue. You think it's quite "fair" to split things up between you, whether it's washing dishes or walking the dog. But the desire to divide things 50/50 means that you are constantly counting, pulling the blanket over yourself and sooner or later you have a feeling of dissatisfaction with each other, because everyone believes that they have done more. You're spending too much time trying to restore justice.
Try using a system similar to what economists call "comparative advantage," where each of you is responsible for what you do best. You can pay bills, buy groceries, and do laundry, while your spouse cleans and repairs things when they break down. After a few weeks, you may end up doing more, and sometimes it may be 75/25 in his favor, but you won't be following the process. So if your husband goes grocery shopping, you can clean the pantry.
2. You deny your husband intimacy.
Over time, any relationship loses its brightness and enchantment. You may no longer feel the same desire as when you first met. Therefore, in order for sex to bring joy even after several years of marriage, you both have to work hard. Economist George Lowenstein argues that each of us has two halves. The first one is rational and thinks as follows: "I will have sex with my husband when I come home, I will feel very good because I love him and appreciate our marriage." The other half sometimes tells us, "I had a bad day, I'm tired, and I don't want to have sex. I'd rather lie down on the couch and watch TV."
When you are not in the mood and feel the influence of the other half, make an effort and listen to the first one. Make sex a chore, like brushing your teeth or having lunch. You may not be in the mood, but you never need to regret what happened, and soon you will enjoy it, and you will begin to experience new sensations.
3. You assume that a fight is the end of a relationship.
Relationships are cyclical, they have ups and downs, just like in the economy. They can't end because of a trivial quarrel. It is best to draw appropriate conclusions and seek compromises. Often you don't pay attention to your partner's desires and miss something. Learn to see the good in each other and put up with the flaws.
4. You solve problems by figuring out who is right and who is to blame.
Bad idea! At a certain point, you need to stop. You can sort things out until the morning, as long as you don't go to bed angry at your spouse. But this is wrong. After all, in the process of developing a quarrel, there will only be more and more claims and resentments. So sometimes it's useful to go to bed without making up, so that we can talk again in the morning. But your irritation will subside and your anger will subside.
5. Underestimating the power of small changes.
Do constant housework and the fact that you spend almost all your time with your children make it impossible for you to take care of yourself? Try to make some minor changes to your behavior and appearance. This may be enough for your husband to fall in love with you again, and you don't wonder if he likes me. 1xBet Anniversary Bonus offers signed-up clients a free bet. The
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